By: Cindy Ricardo, L.M.H.C., I.R.T.

Stressed out? Join the club. According to an American Psychological Association (APA) survey taken in 2004, fifty-four percent of Americans are concerned about the level of stress in their everyday lives.In our ever-changing world, it’s no wonder stress is on the upswing. But what really causes stress and is it necessarily a bad thing? Stress can actually be helpful or it can be hazardous. How stress affects your body depends on how you choose to deal with it and manage it in your everyday life.

What causes stress?

Think about a situation you considered to be stressful. Did you feel overwhelmed, helpless and frustrated or were you energized, challenged and hopeful? What was your body’s reaction to the situation? Did your muscles tense up or was your heart racing? Was your first reaction to ignore the situation by avoiding it/running away or did you stay and confront the issue? Your response to these questions is as important as the way you view situations and will determine how you deal with it. In fact, how you perceive both the situation and your ability to handle situations is what causes stress.

Different approaches to stress

Not everyone reacts to stressful situations in the same manner. Take getting stuck in a traffic jam. One person may get angry and engage in behaviors that increase feelings of stress and anxiety--honking the horn or raging at other drivers. Another person may see the same situation as an opportunity to engage in relaxing or calming activities. Even catastrophic events, such as natural disasters, will bring out different reactions in different people.

How stress can help you grow

Some stress can is helpful by enriching our lives or challenging us to reach our potential. Think about promotions, weddings, starting a new business venture, moving into your dream house or having a baby--all life changing situations that can be exhilarating, uplifting and exciting. They can help you to feel successful, reach your potential and enrich your life. In this way, stress can be good. In fact, living a stress-free life is impossible and would be boring and dull.

Stress can be hazardous to your health

Negative stress and an inability to recognize the impact on your physical and emotional health can be dangerous. Long-term or chronic stress can cause serious physical and psychological illnesses and in some cases it can lead to death. Some stress related illnesses are: heart disease, high blood pressure, weight gain/loss, migraines, depression, alcoholism, anxiety, insomnia and eating disorders.

Managing Stress

Building awareness of the impact stress has on your mind and body, and changing the way you deal with stress leads to a healthier and balanced life. Here are a few ways to start managing stress in your life:

• Recognize and identify how you can andle situations that cause stress in a healthier manner. (For example, some people have difficulty expressing their feelings. If they learn how to be assertive then their perception of the situation and their ability to handle it will be completely different.)
• Eliminate unhealthy ways of coping such as alcohol, drugs and food and replace them with healthier methods such as exercise, yoga, spiritual practice or outdoor activities.
• Become aware of negative self talk. Find ways of building yourself up instead of tearing yourself down.
• Be aware of ways in which you are contributing to the stressfulness of the situation. Would planning ahead or being better organized help you feel more in control? Are you avoiding things? Making small changes can make a stressful situation more manageable.
• Take care of your physical, emotional and spiritual needs. Listen to your body signals. Are you getting enough sleep, eating balanced meals, exercising?
• When you are feeling tense, stop and do some deep breathing exercises visualizing yourself in a serene, tranquil setting.
• Learn the difference between what you can and cannot control. Thinking you are responsible for everything or for another person’s life can lead to feelings of failure and depression.
• Set healthy boundaries. Overextending yourself or saying yes when you really want or need to say no, leads to exhaustion, resentment and stressful relationships.
If stress has become overwhelming to the point where it is affecting your physical and emotional health, seek the assistance of a therapist or join a support group.

Cindy Ricardo is a Licensed Mental Heath Counselor and an Imago Relationship Therapist. She has a private practice in Coral Springs, Florida where she assists individuals and couples to develop loving and compassionate relationships. Contact her at 954.793.6442 or visit www.acaringcounselor.net