Mary DuParri is a Licensed Professional Counselor and National Certified Counselor in private practice in Chesterfield, MO . She counsels individuals, couples and families to help them build the emotional strength and assertiveness to live more authentically. Mary provides therapy for major life issues such as depression, anxiety, divorce, relationship and family crisis. She also helps with fine-tuning life’s smaller issues to improve communication and connection. Mary has spent a lifetime in “helping professions.” Starting in the healthcare field as a clinical microbiologist, she is now a counselor, consultant, group facilitator, speaker and businesswoman. Her warmth, humor and connection to others combined with her psychological training and communication skills help people identify and work toward improved relationships and more satisfying lives.
Mary holds a Master's Degree in Counseling from Webster University, St. Louis, MO. and an undergraduate degree in Medical Technology from the University Of St. Francis, Joliet, IL. Mary has been in private practice in west St. Louis County since 1992. She has presented over 100 seminars and classes on Self-Esteem, Assertiveness, Communication, Parenting, Women’s Issues and other topics for the St. Louis Community College, Working Women’s Survival Show, Parents As Teachers, The Gateway National Multiple Sclerosis Society and other local organizations. Mary mixes stories, humor and practical tools to give her audiences an enjoyable focus for learning.
Mary writes Authentic Living, a newsletter containing tips on personal growth, family issues and emotional health. Her newsletters have appeared in The Counseling Corner, People First of Missouri and MS Connection. Mary serves on the Clinical Advisory Committee for The Gateway National Multiple Sclerosis Society, is an instructor in the community education program for St. Louis Community College at Meramec, is a volunteer for the Rockwood School District Partners In Education program and is a member of the Internal Family Systems Association.
On my journey to finding my truer self, I keep having thoughts about Mr. Miyagi. He is the character from the movie Karate Kid; the Sensei or master who is ostensibly training his student in karate skills, but is really training him in life skills and wisdom. What draws me so about Mr. Miyagi is the richness of his life. In Karate Kid, we eavesdrop on a man who seems to be strongly connected to his inner self.
Mr. Miyagi is strong. Small but strong, and able to defend himself but rarely having to. He is quiet. We see him meditating in what appears to be a regular and natural part of his life. He takes time for himself and expects others to honor that time. He takes care of his body and his spirit. He does not let others usurp his boundaries, but his needs do not take anything away from others.
He is disciplined and respects hard work. Yet, he does not live in a Spartan environment. He surrounds himself with things he loves. His home, his cars, his furnishings reflect not a life of deprivation, but one that is rich with things that matter to him.
He is a teacher who is not afraid to frustrate his student in the process of learning. He holds his student’s better self in mind even when the student cannot. He calls the student to be true to himself, and sometimes to a higher self than the student can see. He invites the student toward excellence and helps with the process if the student is ready.
He honors and is loyal to those he loves and admires. He is respectful, even to people who do not reciprocate the respect.
He creates time for small rituals that nourish his spirit. He invites others to share in his practices and encourages them to honor whatever they are called to create.
He seems to not waste time on petty matters. In living with mindfulness, he raises small, mundane tasks to a level of importance and thus makes many things matter.
For me, Mr. Miyagi is the kind of role model a therapist named Jenny Gresko talked about at a conference last year. She said that as we become more and more self aware, we go shopping in the universe to find people who display traits that we are trying to incorporate into our lives. I go shopping all over for these role models, including in the movies and in a character like Mr. Miyagi. Thankfully, there are also real role models in my everyday life. Individuals I admire and respect who live in my presence and regularly demonstrate their values, their depth and wisdom. People like this are also around you, quietly living their lives in ways you might emulate on your journey to truer self. Look for them.