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THE THERAPIST PSYCHOLOGIST BOOK STORE
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Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst By Dr. Rick BrinkmanDr. Rick Kirschner ( McGraw-Hill )
Release Date: 2002-02-27
Average Customer Rating:
List Price: $16.95
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Product Description
The international bestseller--more than 500,000 copies sold! With their 1994 international bestseller, Dealing with People You Can't Stand, Drs. Rick Brinkman and Rick Kirschner armed a civility-starved world with no-nonsense strategies for dealing with difficult people with tact and skill. Since then, cell phones, the Internet, voice mail, and other technological wonders designed to bring people closer together have only made it that much harder to avoid "people you can't stand;" even worse, they've also created exciting new ways for annoying people to realize their talent for being pains in the butt. Updated and revised for the digital age, this new edition of Brinkman and Kirschner's bestselling guide shows readers how to successfully combat the whiners, grenades, tanks, snipers, close-talkers, pedants, and other rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who can ruin your day at work, in stores, on the street, in restaurants, at the movies, in waiting rooms, by fax, phone, and E-mail, and in cyberspace.
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 You can't fit it all in one book
This is a light, easy, funny, and informative read. However, it's strikingly similar to "Coping with Difficult People" by Bramson, which was published first. Both books describe the same exact handful of problematic people and even share some of the same labels for them. If you don't know a person like this now that you could use some help with, chances are you did in the past or will in the future. However, you probably have problems not discussed here. This book is thorough in what it covers, but it could discuss more problems than such a small handful, and it's all about problems with people at work. You could probably apply some of this to situations outside of work, but it's a bit impersonal for use with friends and family.
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How to deal with stress-inducing people ( barbthejavamaster )
I read this book as part of a college course on professional communication and I can honestly say it's helped me to deal with my coworkers much better. The authors divide the book into sections dealing with one of ten possible behaviors that represent people at their worst. Their advice is sound and is often accompanied by real life anecdotes from those who field-tested this advice. I would easily recommend it to anyone, especially those in management positions or in human resources.
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 Dealing With People You Can't Stand ( andrecito11 )
This book was easy to read and very explicit in its techniques and strategies for dealing with 10 common, difficult personalitites. It applies to work and home.
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Life Changing ( gsmiller0707 )
It was a very stressful time in my life. I was dealing with hopeless beauracracies on the phone, a new boss that seemed to have just gotten out of the military and an ex-husband that, surprise, surprise, was still doing the same, make me crazy, behaviors 10 years into the divorce as when I was married to him. I didn't like the way these people were acting, but even more I didn't like the way I was behaving around them. I was getting so frustrated on the phone, I was either to mad to be effective or I would hang up in frustration. I didn't even know how to deal with a boss who micromanaged when I wasn't even used to having a manager at all. As for the ex-husband, well, I was the one left completely frustrated by my encounters, I'm sure he never gave them another thought.
This book shows you the 10 types of people you can't stand. It shows you the 4 things that motivates each of them and it shows you how to handle them and you. It is not some easy you fix them book. It is definitely you who has to change and sometimes you will have to gag as you say certain things or choke on the words you are holding back. But, it will work and has worked for me. By showing you what motivates people, it shows you how to solve your problems with them. It shows how to deal with them in person or on the phone. It also shows you what may be the most shocking to you and that's what to do when you behave like one of the 10 people you can't stand. Thereby, helping you to understand what motivates you to act a certain way at times and then helping you see a better way to handle those situations. I found that most people are more than just 1 type of person. It's very eye-opening and it not only helped me deal with frustrating phone calls, confusing bosses, the same-o, same-o ex-husband, but was also extremely helpful in dealing with the behaviors you can't stand in your children and other relatives.
It has made all the difference in how I interact with people. I am no longer the one that is frustrated. feeling hopeless, seething with anger or, more importantly, not solving my problems. Additionally, I work in a call center and the book had the added benefit of giving me better skills at handling people that are upset when they call in and I, though very sympathetic, am not able to offer them the solution to their problems that they want. When you have those frustrated callers that you would like to help and you know that normally you may have left them feeling like you didn't care, they give you skills to make the person calling in feel like you really do care and that you are listening and doing what you can to help.
If you are willing to be the one to change, you will actually be able to handle all the people you can't stand after reading this book. Very few books are life changing, but I can't tell you how thankful I am that this is one of them.
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the difficlties of self-knowledge
I found this book is quite helpful in identifying differing communication styles and in giving suggestions for how to deal with them. One of the major, salutary, insights is that each of us probably has a communication styles that irritate somebody, somewhere. Ouch! But recognizing that aspect of "the problem with OTHER people" gives us a better chance to improve matters. I liked the humor, too.
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