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Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life By Susan ForwardCraig Buck ( Bantam )
Release Date: 2002-01-02
Average Customer Rating:
List Price: $16.00
Price: $10.88
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Product Description
Are you the child of toxic parents?
When you were a child...
• Did your parents tell you you were bad or worthless?
• Did your parents use physical pain to discipline you?
• Did you have to take care of your parents because of their problems?
• Were you often frightened of your parents?
• Did your parents do anything to you that had to be kept secret?
Now that you’re an adult...
• Do your parents still treat you as if you were a child?
• Do you have intense emotional or physical reactions after spending time with your parents?
• Do your parents control you with threats or guilt? Do they manipulate you with money?
• Do you feel that no matter what you do, it’s never good enough for your parents?
In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward draws on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents — and discover a new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.
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Amazon.com Review
All parents fall short from time to time. But Susan Forward pulls no punches when it comes to those whose deficiencies cripple their children emotionally. Her brisk, unreserved guide to overcoming the stultifying agony of parental manipulation--from power trips to guilt trips and all other killers of self worth--will help deal with the pain of childhood and move beyond the frustrating relationship patterns learned at home.
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 MUST HAVE if your parents are crazy like mine!!
Do you walk on eggshells around your parents? Do you dread seeing them, really? If so, chances are, your parents are toxic and they have you under their control. I have since realized this after 36 years. This book almost appears to have been written by me as it captures what happened in my past and recent relationship with my parents. Get this book! They are crazy and you no longer have to buy into their loonyness! By the way, I just saw a counselor and she said that the first person to either leave the family or get kicked out of it is the healthiest. GO for it; run! You can't change them no matter how much you pity the crazies!!
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 Good but not great
Reading this book will confirm what you already suspect about your parent's behavior if you have toxic parents. It will also confirm that many of your emotional habits, such as letting people walk all over you, or not standing up to others because you don't want to make them angry, are because of the way you grew up. This book may help you to redefine your relationship with your toxic parent if you are in a position of still desiring a relationship with that parent. The short coming of this book is that it lumps so many kinds of abuse into one book that you don't get a good feel for how to deal with the specific type(s) of abuse that you experienced. It also doesn't really give the reader any tools to move forward in their own life. Yes, it validates that you were abused, but it doesn't talk about how to move yourself forward in any aspect other than your relationship with your toxic parent. The one thing that I took from this book, and am very greatful for, is the realization that my aging and in poor health, but still miserable, angry, mean, and toxic parent lived her life and made choices to get to where she is today, it isn't my fault she is miserable and mean (even though she would tell me otherwise). I am entitled to live my life, I don't have to feel sorry for her and try to make her feel better at my family's expense anymore. Basically, after reading this book and dealing with a nasty precipitating event, I have realized that I am not responsible for her problems, she is. So if you are in need of validation that your parent is toxic, read this book. However, if you are looking for a way to pull your life together because of childhood abuse, this isn't the book you are looking for.
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 Did NOT receive!
I cannot rate this product due to not receiving it. When I looked up the tracking number it said it was delivered, however, I did not get the package. I have contacted the post office, but they could not do anything. If you could help me resolve this I would be grateful as I will not pay for something I did not receive. Thank you.
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The best of therapy in a book!
Toxic Parents is wonderful and extremely useful. I thoroughly enjoyed reading the second half of the book in particular. Susan Forward has written and explained various techniques to help you re-gain control of your life. There are that many techniques and activities that I doubt you wouldn't be able to find one that works for you.
I found the book 'Controlling Parents' by Dan Neuharth to be better at explaining the different types of control and more about the insides to the problem, whereas this book I found to not be as in depth in that area. I just found that this book helped tremendously in regards to its therapy techniques.
Overall, both books work extremely well hand in hand. I recommend them both, regardless of whether you are in therapy yourself or not. There is a lot you will learn and come to understand and ways in which you can help yourself regain control of your life and independence.
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Also read "Be Sweet" by Roy Blount Jr ( alhashimi4 )
If Susan Forward never typed another word her life would be well spent. This book should be required reading for every expectant mother or couple... the sooner we stop the legacy of bad parenting the better. Just as important adults can figure themselves out better if they get a better insight into their own childhoods.
I think one of the great unsung books on the subject of toxic parenting and the confusion it creates from an accomplished author about his own childhood is "Be Sweet" by Roy Blount Jr. It is pure genius and I highly recommend it. Interestingly, a lot of the reviewers and subsequent commenters don't "get it." I would hope that these books get discussed a lot on amazon; it is one of the greatest features of our times and can do a lot to enlighten us individually and as a society.
Along the lines of pure psychological brilliance Alice Miller and Alexis Morgan (recently changed her author's name on amazon to Nancy Carter, author of "Fortresses to Build") are also incredible.
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Addiction
